


Love so crazy

by kittyspring



Category: Heathers (1988)
Genre: F/M, Getting over first love, Knifes and Guns, Sad and angry JD, Set after the movie, Yandere OC, attempt rape later, memory problems
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:35:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23709244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kittyspring/pseuds/kittyspring
Summary: JD survived the explosion but wound up in the hospital. Veronica didn't tell anyone what he did and instead went about her life. As usual JD had to move, another town another school with the same stories. Three popular girls dragging people along, two meat heads thinking only with their dicks, suicidal outcasts, geeks wanting to b noticed. But somethings off this time. Something distant and content, something pink.
Relationships: Jason "J.D" Dean/Oc
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	1. new town, same story

It came as a surprise, no one expected Jason Dean to survive. But crazy has a way of sticking. After the explosion outside westerberg the cops and ambulance was call. Getting there just in time to piece the boy back together and get him into emergency surgery. After a couple days he woke to an empty hospital room. What did he expect, Veronica to be beside him waiting for him to wake up. No she was done with him. It was a harsh reality but then again so was everything in his life. 

It took him a good month to recover and finally be discharged without worry his guts would fall out. His torso was covered in scars now from all the bullet wounds and tears from the bomb. Even his middle finger had a scar all around the base where they sewed it back on. He didn't want to go back to that shit hole and he didn't have to. Business as usual, his dad got another contract somewhere else. So it was back to packing and loading to leave the town. 

Fresh start they say, what a load of bull shit. He had no choice but to be dragged along to where ever his dad was needed. They drove through the town to the highway, passing the 7/11 on the way. As they drove by JD saw Veronica talking to some guy outside, both holding slushies. It was the last stab to his heart before they truly left. 

It was like he sank back into himself, moving on auto pilot. Un loading the truck, setting boxes down without really unpacking in the rooms of their new house. Plugging in the tv first then the radio. Unpacking the kitchen stuff as his dad enrolled him in the closest school. Just an empty husk, somehow emptier then he was before. Covered in scars of his first love, unable to forget the tears in his heart. Literally. 

But he kept moving on auto pilot, observing the same things over and over. Watching from the lunch table at the same scene he's seen countless times. Clicks sitting with clicks. Stoners out behind the school or by the lockers outside the lunch room, geeks and losers sitting at their own tables looking miserable and lost. Suicidal edge lords openly cutting themselves in view cause no one cares, no one cares. Jocks throwing things and being the loudest of the bunch like a pack of gorillas. Always two head jocks who have been friends since they were kids, thinking with only their dicks. And of course the head bitch making the girls try so desperately to please her so they can taste popularity. Another Heather by the name of Liz and another Veronica by the name of Cory. 

She looked at him and instead of eyeing her he glared and looked down at his sad excuse for a lunch. Not again, never again, It was clear he wasn't lovable. Not like the Heather's of the world were. But there was something different about this lunch room. There was this distant clicking noise every now and again. But he couldn't find the source of the noise. Was it in his head, was he hearing the left over of the bomb ticking away. 

As predicted the head bitch and her Veronica, Cory walked up to him and he knew what was coming. "H-Hi can I ask you a question" the blond asked as she bite her lip. The sight turned his stomach. Not again. "No" he left no room for interjection. He began to stand up as she started talking again. "A-Ah it'll be quick, it's just a lunch time question to see everyone's answer um and-" she stammered as he stepped towards her. "Move" he glared at her like everything wrong in his life was her fault. She stepped back and he started walking away. Hearing the Heather, Liz telling the small girl off. 

As he blocked out the noise he heard the click get louder. He stopped and looked around, it wasn't the ticking of a bomb he was hearing. It sounded more like a camera. Among the red and orange of the school he spotted a very light pink scheme. A girl standing by the wall in a long pink skirt and white blouse covered with a pink button sweater. Two braids with flower clips in the brown hair and a pink camera covering her face as she took pictures. She lowered the camera reveling metal glasses set on a long nose and a chipmunk shaped face. Long and chubby. For a second he was mesmerized, he'd never seen someone like her. An observer like him dressed in pink and white. While he wore grey's and black's. 

He forced himself to look away and keep walking. Even if she looked different she was just like everyone else. Looking for a chance to be popular and acting like she didn't care or wouldn't bother. But he knew the truth, he'd seen it enough times. Lived it to the tragic end. Is this what he was gonna do now that he was dead, just live the way he did in life. Watching the teenage angst and desperation in a numb abyss while he seeks out a cold slushy to freeze his over whelming thoughts and force himself to feel something. 

JD walked the school yard to enter the school and sit in his first period class, just wanting to get the days over with. But he heard the clicking again and stopped. He spotted the girl pretty fast, she was the only thing in pink. She had her camera pointed in his direction and he raised a brow at her. She took a picture then lowered the camera again. This time a smile formed on her face. But it didn't last long, one of the jocks made a grab for her camera and she pulled it close to herself. Caging it in her arms then running as fast as she could away from them. 

It was kind of peculiar she didn't stay to yell at them or stammer embarrassingly. JD had to admit it was mildly interesting. But he put the thoughts away. Just focus on the mundane school work and get a grade. Then it will be the same shit in a month or two. Pack up, leave, new house, unpack, new school, same scene. He really did die just to relive his life. 

He took his books to the library, not really to study but to pass the time while he was here. Most of the tables were taken up by students using the space to gossip rather then read or work on something productive. All except one, off to the side and in front of a large window. Only one person sat there and of course it had to be the pink girl. But today she didn't look so pink. She had a light pink sweater on but a black shirt under. She had black leggings on under her pink skirt and black shoes. No not very pink today. 

He sat down across from her but she didn't seem to notice him. To busy in her book. Whatever at least he'll have some peace here. He went to read his own book, poetic justice his favorite stories. But he was interrupted by a gush of voices. He looked up to see Heath-Liz and half her Cory and another Heather sat at the table. He was gonna try to go back to his book but the pink girl spoke up. "Leave your whinny voices are distracting me from this riveting story" her voice didn't shake as she spoke. The head bitch rolled her eyes "Then sit somewhere else pinkie" she ordered. JD watched waiting for the girl to obey but she didn't. Instead she gave an odd look and raised her brows at the bitch. 

She reached under the desk and pulled an air horn from her bag. Before she pressed it JD as already smiling at the scene. The pink girl edged the object as close to the bitch as she could then pressed the button. All three of the girls screamed and stood up at the surprise noise. "Whats your problem Lilly" the Cory girl shouted. "What didn't like that noise, well I don't like yours. Leave" the pink girl emphasize the last word. "I will end you worm" the bitch spoke. The girl rolled her eyes. "Ya have fun with that just do it where I can't hear you" she waved the group off as she picked up her book again. The girls walked away in huff. 

JD stared at the girl across from him. She was fairly odd. Not just a distant observer wishing to be noticed like he thought. She was different, actively distancing herself from the popular girls with no desire to be like any of them. Just wanting to be alone where she's content. Huh a content high school student now that is odd. 

He didn't try to talk to her though, there was no point in making friends when he'd just leave again. At least this time he had something new to watch. Someone different, unpredictable, fresh. Guess that's how he found himself sitting outside her house watching the light in her window. Once upon a time he'd climb up and surprise a girl that didn't bore him. But now he wouldn't dare ruin this show by touching it. 

He just wanted to know how she thought, what went through her head to make her different. Make her careless about stature and clicks. What made her so fascinated by her camera clicks if she so clearly didn't like the world around her. Maybe she thought the same about him, he noticed shes been pointing her camera at him more and more as the days go on. Maybe she wondered about him the way he wondered about her. 

But something made him ant to stop. JD was walking down the hall as he often did. He saw something that made him feel stupid in an anticlimactic way. He turned the corner to see one of the jocks corner the pink girl. He forgot her name some time ago. The jock blocked the view of the girl but looked rather pleased. After speaking for a bit he took off his jacket and threw it over the girls shoulder. JD still couldn't see her expression but he bet it was a pleased one. Of course she wasn't above the construct of popularity she just hated other girls and wanted the jocks to herself. 

It's been awhile since he'd seen it and the thought made him sick. She was just like every love sick girl thinking she was so special cause a muscle head payed attention to her. The meat head left and the girls shoulders sank. She turned to walk down the hall, shoving her hands in the pockets of the jacket. She seemed surprised for a second then started giggling to herself as she walked by. Stupid high school chicks. But even though she was a love sick idiot that hated other girls cause they were competition he still fallowed her. 

Instead of going to the lunch room she left the school. Odd he thought. He fallowed her to the small forest a few blocks away from the building. Why go so far where theirs no restaurants or anything just a grave yard and surveys of houses. He climbed up and into the wooded area. He lost her though somewhere deep in trees. He gave up and went to leave but the smell of gasoline hit his nose. 

Now he was to curious to leave, he fallowed the scent to a dirt clearing. In the clearing he saw the pink girl but she wasn't wearing the Letterman anymore. The jacket was tied and hung on a long piece of wood. JD watched from the trees as she took out a small pink case from her pocket and opened it. Inside was a few matches and some rolled joints. The girl took out a match and lit the jacket. It caught on fire instantly. 

The fire traveled fast and grew pretty wide. The girl took a joint out of the little case and used the roaring flame to light it. Was he wrong again about her. Was that jock harassing her and she was stuck with the jacket. Did she giggle because she thought about doing this. Set it on fire and just watching as it burned. Was she an anarchist. Could he bring himself to actually talk to her, to change his death so it wasn't the same as his life. 

He took a step back, to many thoughts running though his head. He stepped on a branch and the pink girl turned to look at him. For a moment their eyes met, really met. Not the glances they have when seeing each other across the school. JD's dark brown eyes looked at the girls and for a moment he swore even her eyes were pink. But that had to be color association, they were brown, a golden brown. Right? Before a word could be spoken between them they both heard a group of hikers coming closer. Instead of rushing together they split off in opposite directions and booked it. 

But the scene stuck with JD. The fire, the changing colors of her eyes because his damn memory wanted them to be pink. The way she glowed from the flames behind her of the letter man she was forced to take and burned as a 'fuck you' to the jock. She was different? the thought irritated him. It made him think of his ex. Different? Unpredictable? Odd? Strange? Un-something. Augh the word was on the tip of his tongue but he couldn't figure out what it was. 

He took what money he had left and just left the house. He needed some air, to feel the wind on his face and a slushy in his brain. Sure it didn't really make sense but nothing really did. JD drove to the only 7/11 in the whole town. Thank there was one at least. He parked his motorbike and noticed a fancy red car in the distance. Probably belonging to one of the popular girls. He held his handle bars as memories flooded him. 

Memories of meeting Veronica at a 7/11, enticing her, telling her everyone's life has static, falling for her slowly but hard. No he wasn't gonna let her take the one good thing this world has, a slushy. He won't let her ruin this for him, its the only thing that made him feel alive in his dead days. He walked into the store and yep Cory was inside grabbing sunflower seeds. She looked over and smiled at him the way Veronica did when they first met. He hated it. 

She walked up to him as he grabbed a cup. "Um hi I'm Cory, I don't think we really introduced ourselves. I'm Cory and you are..." she batted her eye lashes and it made him sick. "Not staying" JD filled his cup but stopped when he heard a snort. Both Cory and him turned to the convenience store. That pink girl was inside, picking up a bag of chips and trying to pretend not to have been the one ho snorted. She was failing. 

"Uh-Oh that's a shame" Cory began. "Not like you're staying, let me guess all dolled up and slutty for a party probably with older guys your friend convinced you would be an amazing bang and another step in your popularity conquest. But it's not you and you hate having to do all these hurtful things but that's just high school right" he forced a cruel smile as he finished filling his cup. The girl was silent as he popped a lid and straw on the cup. "Ah y-ya how'd-" Cory tried to ask. "Your not special there's a girl like you everywhere usually named Veronica just like there's a girl like that called Heather, Have fun at your party" he turned away from the gaping lackey. 

He walked over to the counter as the pink girl went to pay for her on slushy and bag of chips. But something was off about the wallet she used. For one it was brown and torn not neat and pink like the rest of her. Two when she opened it the Id inside was of a man named Brett. JD chuckled at the wallet, so that's why she giggled when she put her hand in the jacket. The idiot forgot his wallet inside his letter man. The employee bagged her chips and she quickly stepped out of the way so JD could pay for his slushy. 

He broke his rule, he spoke to her for the first time. She was just to intriguing for him to sit by and watch anymore. That's the word he was thinking off. "Greetings and salutations" he forced out, trying to keep his voice steady. Not cause he was nervous just unsure about talking to her. She seemed taken aback by the sudden greeting. Her cheeks matched her sweater as her golden eyes widened. "Ah ya-yes hello" She rolled her eyes behind her lids at her stammering. 

"Hi" she tried again sounding a little more sturdy. JD smiled at her "Jason Dean, I go by JD" he held a hand out to her. She moved her bag to one hand and shook the one offered to her. Her grip was firm and confident. JD was taught at a young age that you can earn a lot about someone from their hand shake. A lose shake is given by someone who isn't confident or doesn't believing what they are working towards or pitching. A strong hand shake is given by a confident person, charming and sure of their pitch or cause. Usually con men are the only ones with strong hand shakes. 

"Lilly" she simply said and smiled a little at him. "Lilly, like the flower" he hummed in thought. "Ya no it's short for Lilith the biblical demon" she seemed annoyed. "Are you a demon" JD asked clearly joking. Lilly smiled but didn't really look at him "Some would say mildly disturbed but I think it's cause I don't fall in social statures. It annoys people like Liz or I guess you called her Heather. She can't place me in a click which frustrates her to no end. How can you put someone in place when they don't have one" she giggled at her own analogy. It was fairly funny. 

"Like a parasite in the kingdom of popularity" JD offered. The pink girl looked at him and smiled wide "Exactly" she giggled again. She was a very chuckly girl, like a hyena something was always funny to her. They both walked out of the store, the popular girl car was gone from the lot. "Do you always grab a slushy and chips when you hit a store" JD asked clearly fishing for something. "Ah ya I like mixing all the flavor's and making a mud slide, it's an intense rush of flavor also helps cool down my hot flashes...why did I say that like the world needs to know I burn up or some shit. Now I'm rambling like a loon and I can't stop. whelp the damn has been broken I'll see you around JD, gonna walk away and talk out my ramble" she started backing away and turned to leave still muttering things to herself about first impressions suck and how she can't shut up for the life of her. 

It was interesting, he'd seen chatty Cathy's before. Usually thinking what they have to say is more important then anything or seeking attention by purposely belittling themselves. But never someone who's admitted it and just walked away to have an episode alone. A very interesting girl indeed. 

Instead of going home he sat outside her window again. Just watching her light, it was always on at night. She would always wait till the last shred of light from the sun reached her window before turning on her light and closing her curtains. JD couldn't see in her window but the light still shun through. They weren't pink which seemed odd to him. 

He just couldn't stop watching and it seemed she couldn't stop taking pictures. Every time he heard the click he would see her taking pictures of him. It made him smile and she'd take another one of him. Despite greeting each other JD still kept his distance, watching her from the corners of the school. But she didn't seem eager to be close to him either, content with taking pictures of his day to day death. 

He snuck through the library, knowing she'd be at the little table by the window reading a book. It was a new one every time, like all she did was binge through books. This time her back was turned to the shelves so it was easier for him to walk up and watch her. Or so he thought. When he stopped at a shelf and watched the back of her head. She brought up her pink camera over her shoulder and took his picture without looking back. She giggled and looked over the picture on her screen. 

JD sighed to himself. He walked over to her and pulled out a chair. "You're not very sneaky you know" she told him as he sat down. "Is that so" he smiled at her, her smile was contagious. Like if she was genuinely happy it effected those around her. She presented her camera screen to him, edging a little closer. On her screen was an un-blurry, focused picture of him looking surprised at the lens. "Look at that a perfect shot" she chuckled. JD clicked his tongue then cocked his head at being caught. 

"Besides I have a few others like this, there's you outside my book store" she flipped the picture to the previous ones. She had to click back a bit but stopped at a picture of JD trying to hide behind an advertisement sign as he peered through the window of a book store. "There's your bike by the convenience store and you behind the tree on the lawn outside, not very good at this hide and seek thing" she giggled again. She flipped through a lot of photos to show him the specific pictures. She did take a lot of photos, made him wonder what she did with them all. 

"You take alot of pictures with this" he tapped her camera once and she pulled it to her center as a reflex. She relaxed a little but still held it close "This camera is my life, I-I have a memory problem. I can't really remember things without a trigger so I take pictures of things that catch my eye. Like how clicks act in a heard verses on their own, what people do when they think no ones watching-" she rambled then bit her lip as she looked her camera over. "Do I catch your fancy" JD teased. 

Lilly look up at him, her cheeks matching her pink sweater. "I-You're new I wanted to see how the world reacted to something new" she confessed. "How did the world act" the man asked already knowing the answer. Lilly's smile fell almost disappointedly "the same a little more aggressive but the same." She flipped through the pictures on her screen. "And what do you do with all those photos" he asked as he watched the pictures go by. None regarding football games, pep rallies, assembles. Most of them are abstract, pictures of the lunch room where people are sitting in clicks and doing whatever it is they routinely do. 

"Most of them I scrap but the ones I keep I set in photo albums labeled by the year and months depending on how many I keep" she kept clicking by photos. JD noticed she had a lot of him on her screen. Just him in the distance staring at her camera. It made him smile for some reason. They went through her photos till the library closed. As they walked out Lilly bite her lip in an all to familiar way. "Hey wanna get some coffee" she asked and JD frowned. It still wasn't right, he wasn't gonna let himself hope or be the way he was with Veronica. He didn't wanna have to fight to be loved again. 

"I'm not much of a coffee drinker, have fun with your addiction Lilly pad" he turned and waved goodbye before she could offer something else. He wasn't gonna screw up this little show by falling in love again.


	2. high school parties

He should of kept his distance. He never should of talked to her in the first place. Even though she hasn't moved and still just takes his picture from afar. JD knows he ruined something. She doesn't smile at him anymore just stares at him with those pink eyes. Gold they're gold. She just wears a lot of pink sometimes he thinks her eyes are pink to. 

She's taking pictures now, he hears the click among the chatter of the lunchroom. He thinks he's seeking out the noise. In his turmoil the Heather...Liz that was her name, came up to him. She looked extra pissed as her lackeys looked uneasy. She rolled her eyes and handed over a piece of paper, it was an invite to a party. "Look I'm only inviting you cause some people think your cute" she looked directly at Ver-....Cory. The girl tapped the leaders shoulder and looked away bashfully. It made him sick. 

"But also to give you some advice, its in your best interest to stay away from that pink girl-" she began. "Lilly" one of her lackeys told her. "Whatever, she's bad for your status and you're new enough you can still be something here but not with that psycho" now that statement confused and intrigued him. JD tilted his head a little as he squinted at them "Psycho" he repeated. "When she first got here she poured pink paint all over the cheer squad. It wasn't proven it was her but it was her you know she was obsessed with Carrie and loved pink it was obv-" one of the girls gossiped. "Enough, she's bad for you" Liz finished. 

Now JD was faced with a problem. He didn't wanna ruin his fun but someone was telling him not to do something. Someone he already hated . He wanted to talk to her already, ignoring the earge. But now he wanted to do it just despite this woman, cause it would anger so many people. He licked his lip and stood up. He was really gonna ruin more of this show just to piss He-Liz off. He was really bad with names. 

He tore up the invite in front of the girls and smiled at their offended faces. "I don't need your advice" he told Liz then walked away from the popular group. JD made eye contact with the camera obsessed girl as he walked through the crowed. She was smiling which caused him to smile.

"Greetings" he started once he got to her table. "Salutations" she finished. He chuckled at her then pulled out a chair. "A very angry girl told me not to sit with you" he began like it was bezar. "So naturally you had to sit with me" she chuckled at the situation. He liked it. He liked her laugh. Maybe a little to much. 

"So" he began trying to occupy his mind "this party are you gonna capture it." It some how sounded so stupid to ask. Normally he was more clever about his fishing for information. But his mind was a little scattered, he was kinda wishing there was a slushy machine close by so he could just freeze his brain and stop his thoughts. "How interesting would it be to see how the school truly acts when their guard is down....yes I'm going" Lilly was flipping through her camera. Guess that made up JD's mind.

He'd never been to a party before, they were drama filled. An event with the soul purpose of flaunting ones popularity and status while getting drunk and having unprotected sex like it was some big fuck you to the world when really it was just stupid teens being stupid. But if Lilly was going he guessed he could observe one in person, truly see how demeaning the event can be.

That was his reasoning for why he was now walking up the steps of the teenage infested house. People were dancing outside and drinking like monsters. A couple people were just hanging out looking like they were having deep conversations important to their life and no one else's. He walked up to the front door and were immediately stopped by the two meat head of the school. "Whow there goth uh dude, wheres your invite" it was clear the man was trying to think of an insult and failed. 

This was more of a hassle then JD cared for. He rolled his eyes and went to leave. Screw parties. But his arm was suddenly grabbed by a blond in a very skimpy pink dress. It made him sick, the color looked all wrong on the girl, like an insult to the shade. "It's ok Brett, Dylan he's with me" the woman sighed and held his arm tighter. Guess that was his fate for attempting to see what high school parties are about. Now he was forced to stay by the wannabes side. What was her name, the only thing popping in his head was Veronica. This girl looked nothing like his ex but she was in the same position, had the same infatuation, craved anything that made her feel alive cause she was a dead girl walking to Liz's march. 

He never should of come, the music was to loud and yet not loud enough. This girl was attempting to flirt with him, establish some connection with him. Saying something he's heard before, something Veronica had said. Her voice was high and sweet but to him it sounded just as raspy and annoyed as his ex. Fuck he wanted a slushy not this stupid lukewarm beer. The song died down and so did the girl. The crowed dancing seemed to quiet their murmurs as everyone waited for the net song to play. 

JD closed his eyes, trying to imagine he was anywhere else. Somewhere far away where Veronica's and Heather's can't find him. Then he heard a distant click, as it a tick in his mind or was it Lilly's camera. He opened his eyes and looked around. But he didn't see pink in the crowed just blues and reds and browns. He knew he heard the click, it wasn't in his head. He wasn't that crazy. "I'm gonna find the bathroom" JD spoke out as he set the beer down and walked away. "Oh ok I-I'll be here" the woman said but he wasn't listening. He was trying to listen for the clicking. But it was hard with the loud house and the music blaring. 

He walked out of the room and into the center of the house. you could see just about everything here, the kitchen where all the booze was set. The dinning room where more booze sat and jocks forced beer into their team mates. The front room where people lounged and did drugs. The dance room he just exited from and stairs that lead upstairs. He looked around the floor then heard another click. He looked up at the stairs. Standing on the steps and leaning on the rail was Lilly, taking pictures of him standing in the door way. She was wearing the right shade of pink, a light pink plaid dress covering her knees with a white long sleeve underneath. She smiled at him and giggled a little. JD couldn't help smiling back.

He walked up the stairs, standing a little below her. He couldn't help resting his arms and head on the railing. He looked at her as he smiled. Her cheeks started turning pink and she quickly brought her camera up to take his picture. "Now this time I saw you take the picture" he teased. She smirked at him and swayed a little in her stands. "You've seen me take your picture before" she reminded. JD stood up and sighed "That I have....can I see what the normies have been up to this monotonous evening." He asked looking from the girl to her camera. "Well aren't you a wonder for words..." she bit her lip, clearly becoming worried about handing over her life. 

She handed over the bulky camera rather hesitantly. JD was gentle about touching it, waiting for her to let go before he brought it closer. He rested his arms on the railing, dangling the camera over the railing. Lilly tensed and became rather worried beside him. But he was careful with it. He pressed the button on it to see some of her pictures. They were taken from many different angles. Clearly she was constantly on the move. There were pictures of the jocks chugging beer, people dancing to the music, the stoners hanging out in the front room. Rowdy people that some how still stayed in their clicks even as they got drunk. He stopped at a picture of the front room window. In the picture there was two couples sitting outside talking about something deep and important he was sure by their expressions. But he noticed something off to the side. At the edge of the photo he could make out himself, looking out at the porch at the same thing she was taking a picture of. 

The photo made him chuckle. His smile fell though when he noticed a hand shoot up from the floor below. JD was quick to retracted his arm and keep the camera out of whoever's reach. He opened his jacket and placed the camera in his breast pocket. "Aw man I almost had it", "Come on she can't run that fast" they heard some dumb voices say. JD rolled his eyes at the situation but it got worse. That girl with the blond hair, Cory that's right. She started calling his name, searching for him. Lilly began running up the stairs and JD fallowed her. The jocks were fallowing, rushing up the stairs after them and Cory was right behind them. 

Fuck highschool parties, they're more trouble then anything. Not even a causal observer is safe from the idiocy or forced romance. The two ran into the closest room and closed the door. JD locked it and sighed, fuck he was so pissed at this stupid party. At that retarded girl that reminded him of Veronica to much. No matter where he went he was reminded of her and her betrayal. Fuck he just anted to be destructive, to wreck something so bad it made his broken body seem undamaged in comparison. 

"What kind of room doesn't have a window" Lilly's voice reached his ears. He turned away from the door to look at her. She was right there was no window in the room. But there was a lot of female singers lining the wall. Must be one of the popular girls rooms. No way out unless the stupid pep squad lost interest. But that wasn't happening, they heard the knob shake then a couple voices telling someone to look for Liz to unlock the door. 

This was so stupid and JD without his gun to scare them away. They were trapped now. "Liz" a female voice shouted. "Guess that's the end of this social observation" Lilly mumbled as she crossed her arms, excepting that she was trapped. What else could she do. Those peps would come in and pour in the drama effecting only this town. A couple meat heads looking to break something that was precious to an outcast, a girl that was forcing a romance where there wasn't any, the queen bee thinking she owned everyone. It was all so infuriating. 

JD ran a hand through his hair, trying to center his thoughts but it was just to chaotic in his head. He looked at Lilly as the girl adjusted her glasses against her head band. A thought crossed his mind on how to get everyone to leave. But he also feared wanting it to much. He was really gonna ruin this show, not like it mattered he'd probably have to move soon anyway. These were his reasoning's.

"Do you trust me" he asked, he didn't know why he asked. The girl looked at him, she blinked then answered "...yes" she seemed unsure. But it was good enough for him. He rushed towards her and crashed their lips together, gripping the back of her head and her arm. He knew he was kissing hard but he wanted to feel her lips so bad. Taste everything she had. Feel wanted for just an instent. He pushed her against the wall, trapping her against him. Maybe if he kissed hard enough he could taste what flavor pink was. It was a stupid thought but if anyone tasted like pink it be her. 

Suddenly he was pushed back. He guessed he wasn't expecting it and that's why he steppe back as far as he did. Stepped pretty close to the bed, this is the part where she yells at him asking what he was thinking. But that didn't happen. Instead he was tackled to the bed rather harshly, ok so maybe she was just that strong. Before he could say anything Lilly had pressed her soft lips to his. He got lost in the feeling, she was harsh and aggressive just like him and it made him feel desperate to keep her attention. 

He held on to her with one hand as the other ran up her thigh. He gripped it tight and she made such an amazing noise. A little whine that made her lower herself on him. Already he felt himself getting hard just from her aggression and the feeling of her soft skin under his hand. She kissed so desperately. As soon as that word was in JD's head though he started thinking about Veronica and her desperation. How she acted like she was over it all, a dead girl walking. But felt the need to plead with Heather for her life back. 

He didn't want to think about her or how this situation was becoming familiar to him. How he wanted this to stop now and dunk his head in ice at this point. The door was thrown open and Lilly stopped, sitting up and looking at the audience entering the room. "Aw sick geek love" one of the jocks joked and laughed with his buddy. "JD" Cory began to tear up and ran out of the room. "Seriously in my room, out both of you" Liz shouted. 

Everything went by fast. That or JD was really lost in his head, moving on auto pilot again. A flash of colors ran before his eyes. He blinked and was met with the darkness of the night. He was outside but he didn't remember walking out of the house. But he still heard the music in the distance so he couldn't of been to far. He took in a deep breath then heard a laugh beside him. He was surprised by the sound, looking over at the pink girl that walked with him. She was clearly laughing at the situation. But JD wasn't laughing. 

It wasn't funny, he had given in to his desire and kissed the odd girl. Despite not wanting to ruin the show, ruin how she behaved and make it romantic. He couldn't fall for her, if she saw who he really is she'd just leave him in the dust the way his ex did. Leave him for death or try to kill him after he lays his heart out to her, doing anything and everything to protect her only to be stabbed and tron apart. He wasn't made for love and he couldn't fall for someone again. He wouldn't survive if he did. He had to stop it now before she thinks she falls for him. 

"Lilly" he started and her laughter ended. "You look like your gonna say something high school" she teased as she looked at him. But the sorrow in JD's eyes caused her to become serious. "I shouldn't of kissed you, I just...I just got out of a serious relationship, one that tore me up literally. I worshiped her, loved everything and tried to protect her. Tried to make things better for her... our love was god. We were unstoppable together but she turned on me and I thought it was the school getting to her, so I had to blow it up, but she faked her death just so she could surprise me and stop me. She blew off my finger and emptied a round in me. Just cause she- I loved her but I guess I'm not deserving of love. Why couldn't she just love me" he rambled the thoughts circling his head. 

He started crying as he spoke, he tried holding them back but that just made his voice shake more. God what was he doing, spilling his guts and wearing his heart on his sleeve again. He felt cold fingers on his hand and looked up from the ground. He stared into the pink girls deer like eyes, large and brown. She offered him a small smile and he wanted to smack the pity off her face. "Lets grab a slushy and freeze our brains" her words surprised him. Those were his words, the reason he loved slushies so much, his addiction to fighting the pain of day to day life. 

That's where they ended up, sitting outside the 7/11 with their own slushies. One mixed one straight. A pink music player playing soft music. They both laid in the parking lot, propping them selves up on the cement block in the parking space. They were silent for a while, just listening to the music and inflicting brain freeze on themselves. 

"You know what I think about a lot" Lilly suddenly asked. JD didn't know if he felt up for a conversation right now. So he didn't answer her. "What if blood was pink. Would it be prettier to bleed a pink ocean rather then a red river. Would it be more poetic if pink milk ran down your arm when you sliced yourself open, would more people wanna see it if it was pink." JD had to laugh at her. It was such a ridiculous concept but so like her. Pink of course. 

"You and pink" he let out as he breathed in to try and calm his laughing. "I love pink, that's why I listen to cassette tapes. They're trying to compete with walkmens so they now have pink players and pink tapes. Plus its easier to make mix tapes on cassette" he started chuckling at her. "Your deciding factor is pink" he asked like she had to be joking. "I know who I am and what I like and I'm a girl who loves coffee and pictures and wants everything to be pink" she sounded defensive but also distant. 

"Alright....so bleeding strawberry milk" JD prompted. "Ya pink stains instead of red" she continued. Her statement made him think about what that queen bee said about her. She was a psycho just because she covered the stage in pink like a weird reenactment of Carrie. "Is that why you covered the stage in pink, cause you want blood to be pretty" he asked without thinking about it. Lilly smiled knowingly "what stage" she tried not to laugh. But she was such a giggly person it was hard for her not to laugh in some way. 

She was so interesting. Clearly a vandal from the paint spill to the burning of the letter men. Undesired to join the high school empire, openly throwing away chances to be popular. Sure of the person she is, covered in pink and taking pictures of moments. Pictures, he still had her camera in his jacket. He opened his jacket and pulled the camera out of his breast pocket. It was still on, still on the picture of the meaningful conversations. He scooted closer to Lilly and laid his arm above her. "Say pink" he smiled wide at the joke as he set up the camera to take a picture. "Pink" Lilly echoed all to excited. She gave a wide joyful smile as he clicked the button and captured the moment for her. 

He wasn't sure why he did it, why he added it to her memory. Maybe he wanted her to remember this moment, maybe he wanted to remember it. Capturing something interesting before he had to pack up and leave again in a couple weeks. Whatever the reason it was done now. She had a picture of them hanging out like they were friends or something. He wasn't sure what they were. He wasn't in love with her she wasn't in love with him, they didn't seek each other out at school. At least not the way people normally do. He searches for the clicks and smiles at her camera when he spots her. She smiles back and giggles before moving onto the next thing. 

She's not trying to cling to him or force him to be around her. Despite the intense make out they had at the party. She kept the distance he wanted. But he found the clicking noise was getting louder and sometimes he heard it in his bedroom late at night. He wondered if he was craving the noise so his head was playing tricks on him. So maybe he lied, maybe he was falling for her and her genuine character. Maybe that scared him a little and made him sorrowful. Knowing he can't be loved yet falling for another high school girl. Except he wasn't gonna let it happen this time. He was gonna keep her at this distance till he had to leave. He was counting down the days, just waiting till the faces changed and he was forced to learn meaningless names to meaningless problems he's seen a thousand times.


End file.
